Since there’s no escaping this message, it’s probably already reached you. Škoda presented a new concept that is said to be even more modern and groundbreaking than other concepts in its history and fundamentally changes the direction of the brand. So that’s a pretty strong statement, especially when we think back to 1987 and the situation where the outdated and malfunctioning sedans of the all-in-the-rear concept were replaced by a thoroughly modern, all-in-the-front hatchback, but then again, it’s been thirty-five years, which you probably most of the marketing team has no chance to remember.
But what few will remember are the concepts from the turn of the millennium, which showed the direction of motoring in the coming years. Back then, I was a teenager full of ideals, so I believed that one day we would really drive those wreckers with square steering wheels, suicide doors without mirrors on giant wheels. I’m more skeptical today. Evidently, even today’s naive youth have to go through this cycle of disappointment.
How else to explain that it’s the same thing over and over again. Everything. Wheels like a cow? But sure. Cranks? We don’t have Mirrors? For wimps. Doors opening against each other? Clearly! There is also the typical glowing cingrlát and the almost non-existent partition bars between the individual windows. This is how every concept has been for about twenty years. And it always ends up the same. The wheels will be smaller, the cameras will replace the mirrors (fortunately, those cameras instead of mirrors are quite user-friendly), the doors will suddenly open conventionally, which will reveal the unmissable B-pillar, and the door handles – we can hide them nowadays, but I don’t know if he will allow the Boleslav people in Germany.
Of course it’s an SUV, because what else should it be, and of course it’s for seven and “the biggest in the history of the brand”, because it wouldn’t be cool enough without that. It has seven indentations on the front and rear of the bumper, which look a bit like a Jeep grille, but that’s surely just a coincidence, and to add flair, the middle indentation is orange. I guess that will be for an additional fee, and for another additional fee, the recess will not only have to be orange, but also gray. By the way, the whole car is painted in a shade strikingly reminiscent of the “green Agave” shade.
And it’s the same song in the interior too. Displays everywhere you look, the obligatory instrument panel and center panel won’t impress anyone anymore, so we have displays in the doors and also something like a display in the headrest. Will they stay there for production? I bet not. The seats are, of course, shell-shaped, as in every concept, moreover, strangely curved and at any rate different. After all, there will be something that is in Enyaq today, which is not bad, they are good chairs, so why is this futuristic thing that looks like a dentist’s chair from a spaceship stuffed into the concept?
The square steering wheel is also such a classic. In the end, everyone realizes that just as it is not a good idea to change the shape of the wheels, it is not entirely suitable for this part either. The symmetry of the circle comes in handy, for example, when turning, which is an activity that is done in a car from time to time. With it, it is advisable to have a steering wheel that is in the same place in every position, so that the driver can look at the road and not look for where to grab the wreath. The fact that the car will have a “relaxation mode”, which should reduce the time spent sitting at the charger, is a fact that does not need to be further parodied.
Of course, as in any proper concept, we have individual racing seats in the back rows partitioned off by a giant tunnel, because nothing is more practical in a family car than letting a child seated behind the driver step out onto the road. The center console is then used to attach a child seat, which is also great, because anyone who has ever pushed a rebellious infant into the egg knows that it is quite a difficult task even if they don’t have to reach into the middle of the car. But it looks good in the photos, so long live the concept art. Or, but maybe not really, someone came up with the name Vision 7s (7seater) and then noticed that it didn’t work out, so they quickly added it there… but maybe not really.
And so, in the end, the biggest highlight is the plastic floor, which actually takes a detour back to my memory of Škoda cars with the “everything in the back” concept and the new logo. That is, the “new” logo. It’s still that thing that no one really knows what it is – some call it a winged arrow, some call it a hen, and another an Indian. Until now it was green and now it is a different green. Below it was the word Škoda in such a square font, and now there is the word Škoda in a different square font. I’m glad that they brought it to our attention in time, because think for yourself – such an important change would hardly have been noticed by anyone.
The new car based on the concept presented today should no longer have that hen-Indian-bird on the front, but just write Š K O D A with about such spacing, because that’s cool. Stick-on hens will certainly be included in the MiloTec offer.
And that could perhaps be enough for the Škoda news for today. If you feel that I am overly critical, you are probably right. But to me personally, it all seems like a big victory of marketing over real development. After all, there are really capable people in Boleslav and, despite the concern, they are also capable of creating quite good things – for example, the Enyaq mentioned above is the best version of ID4 that exists, which certainly causes a lot of headaches in Vlčí Hrad. It makes me all the more sad that we have to play suicide doors and square steering wheels from the beginning. Impressions from a real meeting with the concept will soon be brought to you by Viola, who is currently sucking on a static presentation. It absorbs impressions, of course. How else.